I am not a moron!

perpetuallyfine:

wheatleyandroid:

perpetuallyfine:

Make sure you do-Or just think extra hard, I pick up things on my-Well, it’s hard to describe, not really, but it’s easier if you just think of it as making a wish and I’ll pick it up-Hopefully. [Waves hand dismissively.]

Well it’s entirely possible-You could, oh but that just makes you more brilliant doesn’t it? A personality inside a machine. You’re close to a new kind of life, Wheatley.

Right! Got it. *Will forget in about a week*

Really? Well, I’m alright with this!

Well, that’s what I do-Doctor, remember? I make things better, things-People, blimey, where was I going with that?

So-What exactly does an sphere-turned-android do in his average day?

I have no idea.

Nothing really interesting, Help around the Facility until I’m told to stop, Er..Read big brainy books. 

kingkoschei:

Hello! I’m Wheatley!

perpetuallyfine:

Make sure you do-Or just think extra hard, I pick up things on my-Well, it’s hard to describe, not really, but it’s easier if you just think of it as making a wish and I’ll pick it up-Hopefully. [Waves hand dismissively.]

Well it’s entirely possible-You could, oh but that just makes you more brilliant doesn’t it? A personality inside a machine. You’re close to a new kind of life, Wheatley.

Right! Got it. *Will forget in about a week*

Really? Well, I’m alright with this!

perpetuallyfine:

wheatleyandroid:

perpetuallyfine:

Oh, alright then! Had me worried there, I’m not a big fan of kidnapping Humans-Not to mention the Humans not being fans of it themselves.

You were trapped in space? Should’ve called for help-I pick up Hitchhikers all the time, well, only if they’re carrying a towel-Were you carrying a towel?

Yeah..They don’t like stuff like that.

Yeah..It wasn’t pleasant. Er..No. Didn’t have any arms to hold a towel with..

Curiously-What did you do at Aperture? You said you were a sphere, but what kind. You can’t be one of the generic cores, no, they’re not quite as lively-I’d even assume you’d been infused with a personality, but that’s almost impossible..

Oh-Well, out of luck then-Always carry a towel when you’re about to be jettisoned into space without a way of getting back, always-Oh and don’t panic. Most important rule of all.

I watched the test subjects! Woke them up for testing and such. *He frowns* I think I have a personality. I have..Er..I feel about certain things.

Carry a towel. I’ll remember that! 

perpetuallyfine:

Oh, alright then! Had me worried there, I’m not a big fan of kidnapping Humans-Not to mention the Humans not being fans of it themselves.

You were trapped in space? Should’ve called for help-I pick up Hitchhikers all the time, well, only if they’re carrying a towel-Were you carrying a towel?

Yeah..They don’t like stuff like that.

Yeah..It wasn’t pleasant. Er..No. Didn’t have any arms to hold a towel with..

perpetuallyfine:

wheatleyandroid:

perpetuallyfine:

Still, I don’t recognize the technology-Oh, you’re very unique. [Waves the Sonic Screwdriver near him, ‘sonic-ing’ him as it were.]

What were you originally? Sorry, I’m the Doctor-I ask questions. Lots of questions, apparently, I’ve been told I can’t stop.

*He watches the Sonic curiously, Going cross-eyed at one point*

Oh! I was a sphere..Thingy..From Whe-Er-Aperture Laboratories!

Aperture..Aperture. [Frowns, trying to think.] It’s on the tip of my tongue-Oh! The ah-Testing Facility, right? Blimey, I thought you’d all sort of..vanished, really.

Not still kidnapping Humans, are you?

Yes! That’s the one!

What!? No no! I kind of.. Er. Left..Aperture..I work at Cara Mia’s Science Facility. My old friend is the reason I got this body! And the reason I’m not trapped in space..

sodapopandroid:

wheatleyandroid:

sodapopandroid:

You ever notice how people end things a lot with I think if they’re not sure of something? 

Yes I have!

It’s automatic, probably an impulse. You ever have an impulse? I always have an urge to dance.

I’m rubbish at dancing! Though I do like making things! And drawing.